Tuesday, October 5, 2010

C.O.N.F.E.S.S.I.O.N

Me (thinking): I have always wanted a life without her; a life without cogitating, about anything that'd have to do with her. But alas! The more I tried to let go of her thought, the stronger the flood of her emotions running thru my vain.

 
I have tried so many times dealing with two or three relationships. I have had the best I have gone for the less. But the thought of her could not still, keep me with the rest. If this life i adore would be surrounded by the broken pieces of our togetherness, then I don’t think I would end up on a bed with a pillow or a cover sheet.

 
Besides her straggling love that fares me away, she knows when to make me cry and when to put smile on my face. I have loved her without hesitation; put her in my fame of this very spot, where many a time her triumphed is forgot.


Her recent confession goes like this; while mine doesn’t matter, because even if I marry someone else today I would still be living in her shadow.


Maryam: “I do care about u Tj I really do, I was not fair on u in the past and u were nothing but loving, I took u for granted and I was wrong.


U deserve to be happy and u deserve someone to make u happy, you’re the best partner anyone cud wish for and I was crazy for being crazy.


I always think about u from time to time and I also always remembered what we had, our laughs fights and our love, it was magical


There's still no replacing u, and even though u also have hurt me and I have done the same u were the best I ever had, I still love u.


But I don't even know what that even means, I’ve hurt too many people also and it's like I can't function in a relationship


I wouldn't want 2 make u sad again I wouldn't want 2 break your heart, all u need now is happiness. Find a girl that loves u and make a home.


Make a family and when your kids come they will be your priority and u can finally get rid of me, I want u to be happy Tj coz I truly love u.


Hey going to sleep now downloading yahoo app on my bb so we will chat tomorrow, love u very much Tj and this time I mean it with my blue heart.


i love u so very much."


Me: ' and i love you too," i reciprocated with discomfort, because im certain-no matter how hard we try to swim back to eachother's arms...the current of the ocean which is fate would always drive us apart.